Working Way to hard in life

[captalex]

Looking back it has been a hard long road. We found our Dory on the hard after loosing a westerly to hurricane Ivan about 10 years ago. Our son is leaving in the fall to jion the USCG (Proud to say following mother and faher) and we couldn't be happier! The boat has become a sore spot for some reason we cannot explain. For three years we sunk every penny into the boat....evey system was upgraded sails were purchased and lines were cleaned......now well its up for sale...again....driving past the marina excuses are made on why we cannot even check on her........it seems sad...has anyone else ever been down this road........

[seajunkie]

What do you mean by sore spot? Why is this happening? An upgraded CD30 ?.... i drool just thinking about having one.

[Clay Stalker]

Your post saddens me but feels familiar....I think I had similar feelings not long ago. But you will need to further define "sore spot." Is your spouse less than enthusiastic about the boat, or is the problem felt by both of you. Is it because you realize you may not reach your dream of sailing off into the sunset or living on your boat? Is the amount of $$ you are putting into the boat frustrating you? Is it keeping you from doing other things you really want to do? I am saddened every time I drive by the marina I used to keep my boat at for some of these reasons.....passions die very slowly.....but we age quickly it seems.....

[Dean Abramson]

It sounds to me like you are not really using the boat anymore, and have no clear plans to do so. This could be from a variety of reasons which are impossible to deduce from afar.

Was sailing something you primarily did with your son? Maybe this is "empty mate's-bunk syndrome."

If that rascal is in shape to sail, I say go on a week-long cruise when the weather allows. THEN re-think your boat.

If you cannot remember what the boat passion was all about, try reminding yourself.

But boats are too expensive to not get used, in my opinion. If my boat sat unused, that would get to me. Maybe it's better to sell and move on to something else.

Today will be my first day of spring boat work. I am excited. I have been looking forward to it. When the spring comes that I don't, I will start thinking about selling.

Just some random thoughts. But I would try to re-kindle the romance, then re-consider.

Dean

(Not a shrink, but I play one on TV. And I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night.)

[mgphl52]

The worst abuse to any boat is no use. 'Nuff said.

[Kevin Kaldenbach]

I have examined your situation and you will be glad to know I have found an answer. The problem is not the boat but where it is. We spent a lot of time looking at boats in the Houston, Kemah area and considered keeping one there. But, the thought of driving in that traffic made us realize we would be so pissed by the time we got to the boat we would be at each others throats. Its not that you don’t want to check on the boat when you pass the marina, its that you don’t want to loose your place in line in the traffic jam caused by the boardwalk.

The answer is simple! Discover Corpus Christi. The best marina in Texas hands down. Walk downtown to dinner or a club, or visit one of two Yacht Clubs at the marina. You can catch the bus at the marina and go anywhere in town.

Now I started this letter kidding around, but there is a lot to be said to being able to get away. We have couples who drive from Austin and Marble Falls every weekend to unwind on there boats and to enjoy the company of other sailors at the Bay Yacht Club. Not to mention that this bay is a better bay to sail.

Or it could just be time to find another hobby.

[Bill Goldsmith]

My yacht club had a "come sail with me" program where sailing novices, powerboaters, or anyone else for that matter, could sign up for a three-hour sail with a volunteer member of the club. Last summer I skippered a couple of times, once taking out a novice couple who are "house members" of the club for a sail, and another time taking an elderly ex-sailorette out, who had not been out sailing in years. Boy, did those two events energize my passion. With my current lifestyle only allowing daysailing and weekending, it can get a little frustrating having a real cruising boat and being tied to shore so much. But those "come sail with me" days really showed me how much sharing this beautiful sport/pastime/passion with others shed light on what it is really all about for me.

[mgphl52]

Good on you, Bill! Toni and I took many, many sailing "virgins" out on KAYLA and all of them loved it. Some even bought their own boats later. My only regret is that we never kept a log of those folks... One time, we had 7 "never-sailed-before" folks with an age range of mid-30s to upper 60s (maybe 70s?) plus us, all on KAYLA (our CD28)! I helmed the entire sail standing next to the tiller. Everyone enjoyed the sail and experience and said it was the highlight of their convention!

[Oswego John]

Michael (Toni too)

I havent heard that term in a long time. Many years ago I sailed with a fellow from Australia, actually from Tazmania.

I got him saying "neato" and he, in turn, got me to saying "good on ya" (accent on "on") when good things happened.

How did you pick up on "good on you"? Where did you hear it? It's not too common a phrase in these parts.

All the best,
O J

[marka]

Early on, our boat was a source of much frustration. I found my teenagers lacked my enthusiasm and my wife either pukes when the sailing is exciting or bored when it's not. I learned that the problem was that I had unreasonable expectations. I learned to enjoy every part of the season, from the pre-launch spring ritual to the fall lay-up and everything in between. I also learned to really enjoy the solitude of single-handing.

I guess my message is try to manage your expectations. If you do this, you'll probably figure out if the boat is for you.

[captalex]

Many of you thoughts and ideas are correct. We have actually taken some time this month to decide what direction we are headed in. First here is some history....if you are interested..I am a Merchant Captain and work about 350 days a year in my current position and my wife is an E7 in the coast guard and works about the same. On top of everything else she will graduate college this year with a degree in mathematics. So basically we have taken on to much to soon and that is the conclusion we have come to. So we are are making some changes.....Selling the boat will happen but not to leave the water but to make a change (if anyone is interested we would be willing to trade for a trawler or sport fish). I am tall at 6'4 and the sailboat is very uncofrotable. Texas has been a great experience and we hate to leave but florida is calling us home. So changes will be be made but friendships and dreams will never go away!