Meeting Up With An Old Friend

[Oswego John]

I don't know, maybe I'm wrong with my assumption that there is some sort of an attraction that docks, marinas, even water views have on sailors both young and old.

Last evening, I was down at the waterfront checking on the lake to make sure that Mother Nature wasn't messing up. That's my job at this stage of my life. It doesn't pay much but the benefits are fantastic.

In the distance, I spotted a figure approaching me that I thought might be someone that I had known from days past. Maybe, maybe not. Things looked differently now from years gone by. As he approached, I now recognized that it was my dear old sailing friend, Puce Beard, the Pirate. In his day, Puce Beard was the meanest, most swashbuckling, cussingest, fiercest, coldhearted, blood thirstiest pirate that ever sailed the deep blue seas. He answered to no one.

Last evening Pucie (I'm one of a very small handful of people who are on a first name basis) was a completely different person. He was hobbling along with one wooden leg. He was missing his right hand and had a hook fitted on his wrist. I sort of melted a bit when I looked at the black patch he wore over one of his eyes.

I didn't want to ask him what had happened but he started to explain what had transpired, what was the cause of his physical situation. I pointed to his missing leg and he responded "Aaarrgh matey, the enemy ship got off a lucky cannon shot and blew my leg off".

Then I pointed to his missing right hand which now had a hook on it. Pucie related on how he was in a sword fight with seven "bad guys" (foul expletives galore) and one of the enemy cheated and whacked off his hand at the wrist. This ticked Pucie off so he grabbed his sword with his left hand and slew the #$%& bunch of cutthroats.

Before I had a chance to mention the eye patch, Puce Beard told me the story of what happened on the last ship that he commanded before he finally retired. I was a bit reluctant to hear of what had happened, why his eye was missing. But he proceeded to relate what caused the missing eye.

"Aye matey, I was standing on the poop deck looking aloft, checking the trim of the sails. Out of nowhere comes a seagull and takes an aerial and it lands dead center in me eye. Immediately by instinct, I went to rub the p**p out of the eye, forgetting that I had a new hook in place.

Stay tuned for the next exciting chapter of the life of one of the last of the "For real" pirates of another age.

Oh yeah, today is Saturday, isn't it.
O J

[Neil Gordon]

OJ,

You know, of course that peg legs were carefully measured so that the wearer could best remain upright... a little long or a little short depending on prevailing winds and preferred tack.

You know of course a Pirate's favorite letter, right?

[Oswego John]

OJ,

You know of course a Pirate's favorite letter, right?

Ummm, I'm going to hate myself later for asking.

What the hey, I'm going all in. "What is a Pirates favourite letter?"

O J

PS: Heavy groans in advance.

[Neil Gordon]

OJ,

You know of course a Pirate's favorite letter, right?

Ummm, I'm going to hate myself later for asking.

What the hey, I'm going all in. "What is a Pirates favourite letter?"

O J

PS: Heavy groans in advance.

Sheesh... not even a guess?

[David Morton]

AAARRRRRRR!!!! of course!

[Sea Hunt Video]

I'm going say "tis the C they love".

[Neil Gordon]

And the winner is....


ROBERTO!!!

"Tis the C that pirates love!

(I know a four year old who just loves that joke!!!)

[tjr818]

Aaayyyeee......

[jbenagh]

And my daughter's favorite joke around age 3:

How do you know if you are a good pirate?

You don't know, you just arrrggh!

Jeff