Not Sure How I Should Feel About This?

[M. R. Bober]

Dick,
Don't let these guys get you killed or injured. If they ask you to join them again, tell them you have a subsequent engagement.
My $0.02

Mitchell Bober
Sunny Lancaster, (Where wisdom does not require bruising.) VA

[Tom Keevil]

i would give them another chance. It sounds like they are new to sailing and/or new to this boat, and do need some help. Going out for the first time and catching a pot line and having the engine not start is a huge amount of stress. I'm not sure how well I would do with that, with all of my years of experience.

So they are probably afraid, and then there you are, telling them they're not doing things right. Even if you were nice about it, and correct, they most likely felt that their thoughts were being dismissed. They were being devalued and not in control of the situation. These feelings of being dismisssed plus fear is commonly expressed by anger. The anger is just a defense to a threatening situation.

Since you thought they were ok guys prior to this, they would probably be easier to work with in a less stressful situation. Just be sure to value their ideas, and hope the engine starts. You'll feel pretty good about it when you see them out by themselves having a wonderful time in the twilight of their years.

Tom

[mcos]

I love going along on another's boat. Make suggestions but remember, if the darn thing crashes or sinks, the captain bears the blame. That said, if some one is the aft half of a donkey and you are not comfortable with their decisions, just say thank you but no the next time your invited along. This is a leisure activity and should be fun. When the sociability and fun index falls off, time to take another tack.

[sharkbait]

I believe I would invite them to crew on your boat one time. Be specific that they are to crew and are not just guests. I had a similar circumstance with a young couple who just needed a little more experience (coaching).